The Trolls claim another victim

When you grow up as part of generation Y it’s only natural that you use social media on a daily basis. Both Facebook and Twitter have become a part of the social fabric and too not use them almost seems unheard of. But sadly there will always be a dark side to using the internet and what has happened to Charlotte Dawson is just one example. I have always had the upmost respect for Charlotte, she says what she thinks and normally doesn’t hold back, you need people like her in the world because without them society would accept the crap it’s fed and not have a voice. She stuck her neck out over the last week and called out those trolls who have been causing a campaign of hate against her and for that I thought she was extremely brave. But instead of the wave dissipating the hate turned into a tsunami and not even the strongest soul would have been able to handle it.
Despite how much I love using social media such as twitter I hate the fact that so many have fallen victim to the trolls that are spawned from it. Celebrities in particular cop the brunt of it because they are in the public eye but just like everyone else they are human and deserve the same respect as everyone else. I’ve been a victim of internet bullying in the past and at the time I wasn’t sure what to do or how to get out of the situation and in the end it very nearly cost me my life.  I tried to ignore the trolls I even at one point tried to reason with them but it made no difference they are the ones who think they have all the power and I saw no way out.
Sadly when it comes to this sort of thing there is no real solution. You can try and catch these trolls, name them and shame them but as the saying goes when you cut the head off the snake 2 more grow back in its place. There are always going to be more out there lying in wait to catch you out and it doesn’t surprise me that many celebrities ignore social media or even fan mail now for fear of hate being thrown at them.
People wonder why trolls do this, why they try and hurt others from behind their keyboard. The answer is sadly very simple, because they take pleasure in seeing someone else’s pain, they love it when they see someone all but give up and enjoy the victory of a battle that was only ever one sided. But a part of me wonders if these trolls really understand the damage that they cause, if they realise that the person reading these tweets or facebook messages is dying inside.
Charlotte my heart goes out to you, what you have had to endure is truly disgusting and I hope that you will fight back and come out stronger from this hell you have been thrown into, because you are so much better than all of them put together.

Oz Comic Con my thoughts

I went to Melbourne last week for their first ever Oz Comic Con, having been to Adelaide’s back in March and enjoying myself immensely I was looking forward to seeing if Melbourne would deliver. I guess in some ways I was lucky having decided to go VIP to the event rather than risk paying general admission. Looking back on it now it was the smartest decision I’ve ever made because there is no way I would have done half the things I did on a general pass,  that being said when you pay the extra money you expect to get a certain amount of preferential treatment. Arriving at the exhibition centre at 8am I did not expect to see lines already out the door, it was only later I discovered that people had been lining up since 4am, the scene was nuts! But even from that early stage I could see organisation was an issue, having collected my pass I was let in a mere 5mins before the general people giving me no time to be able to find anything.
I was lucky in a sense though; having a friend who had decided to go platinum they bought the majority of my tokens for me as the cocktail party on the previous night, meaning I didn’t have to brave what can only be called manic token line. Never have I seen a token line snake around the entire building before in my life and it made it almost impossible to walk around comfortably.  And that was the big issue I had on day 1, it was near impossible to see half the stalls because so many people were clogged up in the aisles either lining up for tokens or trying to get to Stan Lee.  In the end I only bought one thing on day 1 because my body had just about had enough of trying to force my way through the manic crowds.
One of the other things that disappointed me was I saw no panels on Day 1, 2 of the main ones I wanted were on when I was stuck in line to see Stan Lee and I wasn’t prepared to move in case they sent me to the back. And this is where organisation really fell apart, I was forced to stand behind general ticket holders & none would let me through despite the fact I had a VIP ticket. There were no volunteers minding or organising the lines and I watched as many jumped cues and cut in front of me. I was squashed, poked, hit and nearly knocked over so many times in that line it was a joke & it wasn’t until I let fly on Twitter that someone finally arrived.
Why Stan Lee was put in with the booths is beyond me, putting your biggest drawcard in a tiny stall away from the other celebs makes no sense. Yes he is a comic guest but the man has more star power than just about every other guest put together, he should have been with them and then lines may have been better managed. The celebrity area was also poorly done, especially in comparison to Adelaide Comic Con. All the guests should have been on one side, not having 2 lots directly facing each other. Jason Momoa had so many people line up at one point it snaked all the way into Ryan Robbins line, making it impossible to tell who was lining up for who. By also putting the celebs facing each other it made getting food from the cafeteria and using the toilets difficult, so much congestion meant many missed out & I overheard many went hungry for hours.
Day 2 was better, VIPs & Platinum’s were let in 30mins early and it was good to get left over tokens before the mad rush started, it felt easier to move around and I even got to see a panel & do some shopping. But it still wasn’t perfect I personally had 2 issues with Day 2 and they were the photos & panel noise. On day 1 the first photo I got for the day never arrived, I waited until the doors nearly shut until eventually they said they would get it reprinted. It wasn’t until later I discovered several printers went nuts and ate half the pics, I just wish they had said it earlier. Early the next day I did finally get my pic but I know many waited longer & have only just received theirs by mail at their own expense. As much as I enjoyed the VIP panel I went too, having such a tiny amount of people show up in a huge room trying to compete with the cosplay competition next door was a nightmare. I get the need to have the general panels in the big auditoriums but special VIP panels must in future be upstairs or somewhere else. This is one major thing Adelaide did right, there may not have been enough room in Adelaide but at least you could hear the guests properly.
I’m not going to go into the ticket issues that happened, I feel sorry for those who lined up for hours only to be told they wouldn’t get in. In some ways it’s why I’m worried that the venue change for 2013 may cause similar issues I found out that this year’s Comic Con had 10,000 pre sold tickets, which makes me think they should stay at the exhibition centre and just open up the whole place. The exhibition building in Carlton where they plan next year’s Comic Con I have been told is smaller. It’s also a hell of a lot more difficult to get to by public transport and car parking is a nightmare and if the rumours are true that they have bigger guests lined up history could repeat itself.
For Comic Con’s first ever time in Melbourne I enjoyed myself but I will never go again on anything less but VIP. And yeah there were issues but I just hope the guys learn from them so they can make 2013 even better because I will be back next year.

Fighting an Inner Battle

I’ve been sitting here for the last hour trying to write this. Actually no I have deleted this twice because I am unsure if I want people to see this. For anyone who has read this blog before its fairly obvious that I have had my ups and downs, mentally I am in a better headspace than I was in 2008 but it is still a battle sometimes. I’ve been dealing with depression and inner demons for as long as I can remember, there are days where I’m fine and I can be the happiest person on the planet but there are others where I feel useless and unwanted.
I heard an analogy to describe depression once and to me it certainly does fit. Depression is like a castle, inside that castle are all your hopes & dreams and your happiness for the future and the castle walls that surround them protect them from outside forces. But when those demons come at you they are almost an opposing army attacking the Castle walls trying to destroy what hope you have left. And sometimes those Castle walls crumble and break and the only thing that stops that opposing army from destroying your hope is reinforcements from the outside. In my case I’ve had those walls crumble but never destroyed completely, I had outside help when I needed it the most.
But there are nights like tonight where I sit here and those negative thoughts just creep in and float around. They don’t do anything except sit there until you are just about ready to go to bed and then attack you when you are at your most vulnerable. At that point you could say it’s a knight vs. a dragon and only one will come out on top. I get told I’m ridiculous and that I shouldn’t worry sometimes but when you have these types of thoughts you can never take what someone else says at face value. You just keep going around in circles hoping that it will all end soon enough but its only once sleep takes hold that it ever does.
You wonder if you are bothering people, if they want to talk to you or the big one would you be missed if you were not around. I guess these have hung with me simply because of the lack of confidence in who I am as a person. It’s hard for anyone to understand simply because each situation is unique for people and I guess that’s why I can say unless you have walked in my shoes you won’t understand how I feel. I don’t consider this a bad thing because it simply means I have to force myself to talk more e.g. what I’m doing now.
I know I’m not alone in this situation each person has their own battles to fight & their own castle to defend, it’s just a matter of if we can stop those walls from crumbling or not and surviving to keep our hopes & dreams alive.

A thank you to The Voice Australia (RT) @TheVoiceAU

So tonight the first season of The Voice Australia comes to a close and then the excitement of Monday nights shall disappear until Season 2 comes around. In a very short space of time this show has changed the lives of not only the contestants involved but the audience who have witnessed this show play out. People have allowed themselves to open up to new artists, different styles of music and make many realise that there are thousands of talented people out there waiting for that step up into the spotlight. Not only that but this show has sent the Australian charts into meltdown, right at this very minute the top 9 spots on the ITunes top 10 are filled with the final 4 contestants songs that they performed last night and the Aria chart now has songs by many from the show scattered through its lists. And despite the fact only one will officially be crowned the winner tonight I think most of those who have appeared on the show shall have very long & happy careers.

So I say thank you to this show for not only giving me some wonderful & an amazing people to listen to on a daily basis but for allowing me to make a heap of new friends. The power of this show to connect people over social media has been simply outstanding and reiterates a post on here I made last month, which online friends are just as real as those you make in real life. It’s just in this case much easier to connect because you can relate to things much more quickly. This show has also helped repair lives, allowed people to heal all through the power of music and I hope it shall continue to do so for many more seasons to come.
So finally congratulations to not only the four finalists but to everyone who has appeared on this show and to the coaches. Australia loves you and is forever thankful you graced our screens and I think it’s safe to say we are all looking forward to supporting each and every one of you for a long time to come.

The Post i had to write (Please RT & READ)

This is a post I never expected to write, mainly because I am the type of person who keeps a lot of my problems in and just puts on a brave face. But tonight you could say I have been inspired to just put it all out there and finally open up a bit more.
I’ve never had what you would call a perfect life, I have had issues, I’ve never been popular, I’ve never been someone a guy would go out of their way to meet or ask out & if they did it would simply be a joke to use as fun later on. The older I have got the more I have closed myself off from people and I have simply just gone through the motions of life.
I have been bullied so badly over the years that there were times I just never wanted to leave my room and my nature to put others before myself got used so badly I was at one point doing other peoples homework or helping others just so I could be talked too. I’ll admit looking back at it now I was a silly naive girl but it was either this or nothing and I am not someone who deals well with having no-one.
A few people knew that 2008 was a year id rather forget but it was worse than that over the course of 12 months everything went wrong to the point where by the end where I tried to commit suicide. It was only an accident where Delta’s album fell on my head which stopped me, I spent most of the night listening to Mistaken Identify and I credit Delta as one of the people who saved my life. Delta slowly helped drag me out of the hell that 2008 had become and gave me a small ray of hope. Fast forward to the 16^th June 2012 and here I sit on my bed on a cold and rainy evening typing this trying to stop myself stressing over my Tafe course. There are good days now and then there are bad days but I try my best not to let myself slip to where I have been. What I do to stop myself is use my music and in the last few months 3 new artists have been added to a small list which keeps me from making any mistakes. Danni Da Ros, Glenn Cunningham & Rachael Leahcar all from The Voice have voices that can evoke the soul & Rachael in particular has brought me to tears on more than one occasion. Less than a month ago my mind was swirling and I cracked, causing me to feel as bad as I did in 2008 but I used all 3 I mentioned earlier to give me a kind of inner peace & now I listen to them daily.
People may have their opinions when I read this saying I possibly need help, but I’ve already had plenty. Music is my drug now and that keeps me sane, it inspires me and Delta, Glenn, Danni & Rachael have been a big part of that & I can never thank them enough.

And then there were 4 (The Voice)

And here we are the final 4. For the last few months we have been leading up to this point on The Voice and to be honest I am sad to see it coming to an end. I am not surprised by who was chosen by the coaches because nearly 6 weeks ago I made the call and said Rachael, Sarah, Darren & Karise would be the last ones standing and I was proven right. But what disappoints me is with the decision less than 2hrs old the hate has already begun.
Each one of the four finalists deserves to be there on their own merit. I knew the moment Karise opened her mouth at that blind audition that she would be hard to stop and her performance of Hallelujah tonight once again showed how remarkable she is. Sarah has a voice that could stop anyone in their tracks and has been one of the strongest performers from day 1. Darren has a smile and a love and joy for singing that warms the hearts of everyone who listens to him. And of course Rachael the girl who stunned all four coaches when they heard the emotion and power in her voice back at the blind auditions. The sad thing is each one of these four remarkable people is already getting some form of hate, more so than others. Rachael in particular has copped the brunt of this hate and I think this is more to do with her coach than her. To say Rachael only made the grand final out of sympathy is an absolute joke does that mean Glenn deserved it instead? I know full well that if Delta had chosen Glenn over Rachael the same people would have been shouting it was favouritism and so no-one would have been happy.
This show though has taught me something, there is no point in being depressed about seeing your favourite leave. After seeing one of my main favourites Danni leave the previous week it just made me want to support her even more. And that goes for all of the contestants. So I say there is no point hating the contestants or the coach, if you don’t like their music simply respect the fact that others do and leave it at that. We all came into this with our favourites and we leave with those same favourites and in my case a few extras. Depressed fans who are worried their favourite shall drop off the face of the planet shouldn’t worry either; most of these contestants won’t leave the public eye for too long after what they have gained from this show.  So in my opinion no-one has lost, in fact Australia has won, it shone a bright light onto some of the best talent in this country and gave them the shot they all deserved, and we should all be thankful for it.  So don’t hate the contestants, respect peoples choices and let us enjoy what we have..... some incredible musicians.